How Not to Write a Blog Post

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You are a blogger and you love to write.  But you're also a full-time wife and mom and you've been so busy lately that you haven't had any time to dedicate to your beloved blog.  The only thing you've written this week is an absence excuse note and a grocery list.

You are having serious withdrawals.

You complain to your Hubby and kiddies, who in turn, fear for your sanity feel guilty for keeping you from doing something that brings you so much joy.  To make it up to you, they have promised to leave you alone to write for one full hour.  Sixty uninterrupted minutes.  Plenty of time to write one of the genius blog posts you've written in your head the past week.

A blogger's dream come true.

This is the story of how you spend that hour.

•  Grab a cup of coffee and head to your office/bedroom. 
•  Turn on your computer and go directly to your blog's dashboard.  Do not pass go and don't even think about Facebook or Twitter.
•  Stare at the blank screen and spend the first 5 minutes thinking of the perfect SEO-friendly, attention grabbing title. 
•  Unable to think of a title for what could possibly be the best blog post you've ever written, you head to Facebook hoping to find a little inspiration.

•  You glance down at the little clock down in the corner of your computer screen and see that you've already wasted 10 minutes.   You return to your unwritten blog post and focus on writing.   
•  That lasts all of 2 minutes.  Your mind is reeling with thoughts of the day's events and all of the things you have to do before your daughter's birthday this weekend. You can't concentrate like this!  Maybe you'll feel better after you've focused on a smaller task, like answering a couple of emails from earlier this week. 
•  Another 10 minutes have passed and you start feeling guilty because you still haven't started writing that blog post. 
•  You force yourself to buckle down and get to work.  This time you actually start writing. But 5 minutes into your story, you remember that tomorrow is your Hubby's grandmother's birthday, so.... 
•  ...you head to Pinterest for what you promise yourself will be a quick search for the perfect birthday cake to bake tomorrow.   
•  Hubby walks in on you and sees your computer screen covered with images of birthday cakes, inspirational quotes and angel costumes and asks, "What happened to 'I HAVE to write'?" 
•  You look like a cross between a deer caught in the headlights and a prepubescent boy caught looking at naughty pictures online, but you still manage to counterattack with "What happened to 'uninterrupted'?" 
•  Hubby scurries out of the room, but as he closes the door behind him, he reminds you that you only have 20 minutes left.    
•  You close the dozen or so tabs that keep distracting you and return to your half-written blog post.  Reading through it, you realize that it's going to take a lot longer than 20 minutes to finish, so you decide to save it for another day.  (When you have more time to write.)
•  You wonder what other half-written posts you have hiding in your drafts folder and check to see if there's one you could finish in the next 17 minutes. 
•  You discover a draft with a list of distractions that keep you from writing and realize that not much has changed in the last year since you wrote it. 
•  Inspired, you find yourself typing like crazy.
•  20 minutes later you hit "Publish" and hope it serves as a daily reminder of How Not to Write a Blog Post.  

The End.

  Photobucket
 Post inspired by Mama Kat's World Famous Writer's Workshop.  I chose prompt #4: Blast from the Past: What were you writing about last year at this time? Tell us what has changed (if anything) since then.

22 comments

  1. There, you did it! And you got a lot of other things done at the same time...

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  2. OMG - I was rolling laughing reading this.. amen sister - amen.

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  3. This is so true - I get blogger's block all too often.New follower from Mama Kats. Love your blog, hope you'll check mine out too...www.heartofmorgan.blogspot.com

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  4. Fun article! This week it's been the opposite for me: focusing on my blog and no one else but I will try not to log on during the weekend. 

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  5. What fun! I have so been through this!

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  6. Best to have a topic before sitting down, not the reverse. Horse before the cart.

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  7. hahahaha...That's me!

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  8. I think all blogger moms can relate!  I like the idea of going somewhere so that you can close a door and then blog.  I usually blog in the same room with the hubby who asks me every ten minutes, "What are you doing?"

    Enjoyed your post!

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  9. HAHAHAHA!!!!  You're are so on point, it's ridiculous!!!  LOL!  Thanks for the laugh!  ;)

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  10. I could see some of me there, lol. So true. Have a great evening :)

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  11. Haha oh my this is so true, do you have hidden camera set up in my home? lol. Great post, I will be following you for sure now. You know, so on he off chance you do get another free hour to post I can read it :oP hehe.

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  12. love this! reminds me of me for sure. onemoreflewoverthecuckoo.blogspot.com

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  13. A day in a life of a Blogger - - Love it! so true!

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  14. SO TRUE!!!!   Love it!!

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  15. Haha so true!  love this.  I am now following you.  Just in case happend to find another free hour to post something :)

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  16. I'm totally laughing out loud. I have so many unfinished posts in the que that will never be written. What if --- Wordpress rolled them up on top so that one was forced to face their music every day? Stopping by from Mama Kat's -love your site.

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  17. Facebook and Twitter are the distraction devil! I've learned that when I need to really focus I cannot have anything but a blank page in front of me, or else nothing gets done. Lately, I've actually begun writing my stories on MS Word so I don't have to go online at all.

    Great post and how great that your family realizes how important your blog is to you! Not many hubbys/kids would give their wife/mom an hour...uninterrupted :-)

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  18. Love this! Absolutely true. So glad I popped in from SITS, definitely needed the laugh!

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  19. You did it!!! Yay!!! Such a funny post! I loved it. Kudos to you!

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  20. This post made me laugh out loud! I've been here so many times. Love your blog! Just found you off of SITS :)

    Amanda

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  21. I had to laugh... oh how true!!

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  22. Absolutely wonderful. There is really not much more I can say. Except that you are still my blog idol. 

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